Dear Abby: I received a Facebook message from my first cousin. In it, she apologized for not communicating for the past 10 months. It ended with, "Send me your address so I can send you a birth announcement." Abby, I wasn't even aware that she had been pregnant.

I contacted her father, who said the child was born two months ago. This cousin is not a teen or unwed. She's a professional and married. I am puzzled, not only because I wasn't told, but mainly because her message did not announce the birth, other than referencing that an announcement would be mailed.

Frankly, I'm confused and not interested in feigning sudden interest in a situation I was excluded from knowing about. I can't help but assume the purpose of the mailed announcement is a gift grab, coming months after the child's arrival. Your thoughts?

-- Left in the Dark

Dear Left: Heaven only knows what may have happened with your cousin. There may be much more to this story than the fact that you were "excluded." There may have been problems with your cousin's pregnancy or with her baby, which your relatives were reluctant to share. Please don't start a grudge unless you have facts that indicate otherwise. Act appropriately, send a little something for that baby, along with a supportive message, and you will have fewer regrets.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, California 90069. Copyright 2025, Andrews McMeel Syndication.